It has not been often lately that I have been able to be proud of my country. I remember the embarrassment of my first trip to Europe senior year of high school. I was visiting France with my AP French class following the whole "freedom fries" fiasco when the US was ostracizing a country and its leaders for doing the unthinkable...listening to the will of its people. The hypocrisy of that whole episode made me gag. My semester abroad was a little better though I often wished I could say I was from anywhere but the US at times. Why, oh why, wasn't I Canadian? It had been my plan at the time - finish school and head north. I'm happy to say I was forced to stick around for school because I think today, for the first time in a long time, I was proud to be an American.
So, my best wishes and good will go out to our 44th president. And also a good luck because the poor guy is going to need it. I am certainly ready to rise to the call of responsibility he put forth in his speech this afternoon and I think a lot of my generation is as well. Too long I felt like I didn't have anything to believe in and after spending a summer in DC, surrounded by its history and then watching this historic campaign and swearing in of President Obama, I think I do have some restored faith in my country and its people. It always seemed like we were paddling as fast as we could and getting nowhere, hindered by party lines and uncompromising "values" that cripple the government's ability to do anything of use. Here's hoping we're ready for a change, for compromise and a new future with a little more faith and a little more trust that we're all in this together and we can make a change for the better.
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Showing posts with label faith. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Saturday, March 29, 2008
hello again, hello....
I think it's my sentimental mood which makes me name this after a Neil Diamond song. Sad, depressing movies with happy endings tend to make me get sentimental so I apologize beforehand. In search of inspiration to finish this semester still somewhat sane, I watched What Dreams May Come. If you get past the weird casting of Robin Williams, the movie is very moving and visually stunning. It is also one of those movies that makes you stop and think and remember.
I remember watching Dogma, another film that deals with the afterlife, in a more irreverent way or course, but that's besides the point. My best friend from home and I watched it together, I think it was the summer between 9th and 10th grades. We'd just survived Global Studies and a brief introduction to most of the religions of the world by our nutty but dedicated teacher. A was in her "super Jew" phase as she called it and I was a recent convert to "Krystalism," i.e. all the good parts of all religions we had just learned about mushed together. I mostly wanted an excuse to still celebrate Christmas while doing Taoist exercises and reading the Torah. Not that I ever did any of those things simultaneously - I just liked the idea that I could.
What Dreams May Come brought back that discussion vividly for me because I remembered my faith in that conversation that I could believe in whatever I wanted and I would be OK. As I long as I believed in something, anything, it would be better than nothing at all. It's funny all these years later (OK, so it wasn't that long ago but it feels like ions), I haven't changed in that belief. Call me irreverent or damn as I know some people would, I refuse to believe that that makes me somehow doomed or out of the loop or missing some vital experience in my life. I remember watching A in high school and wishing I had a background like that, a deep connection with a religion, with something bigger than me. I think that's where Krystalism came from, my need to connect with something larger, something that would watch over me. Years later, that would fondly come with the smite button more often than not as my PP friends can attest for you. In the end though, I still have that idea of a larger than life presence. I don't think it has an religious affiliation to me. It is simply a friend always there when I need it to talk to or to laugh with. I know I must cause some pretty long laughs. I'm not sure what this makes me or what to call the final product of my faith but I do know I would be lost without it.
I told you this would be sentimental and at the very worse, nostalgic. I find the closer I get to the real world the more I miss those summers and those theoretical discussions which made us feel so very clever and grown up. It's one of those life's ironies that come back to bite you in the ass when you least expect it. At least I wasn't one of those raring to get to adulthood. I was perfectly happy at a kid, thank you very much. Adulthood isn't fitting quite so nicely most days. But every once in awhile, I do like to look back and laugh and see that maybe I haven't changed that much...maybe I haven't changed that much at all.
I remember watching Dogma, another film that deals with the afterlife, in a more irreverent way or course, but that's besides the point. My best friend from home and I watched it together, I think it was the summer between 9th and 10th grades. We'd just survived Global Studies and a brief introduction to most of the religions of the world by our nutty but dedicated teacher. A was in her "super Jew" phase as she called it and I was a recent convert to "Krystalism," i.e. all the good parts of all religions we had just learned about mushed together. I mostly wanted an excuse to still celebrate Christmas while doing Taoist exercises and reading the Torah. Not that I ever did any of those things simultaneously - I just liked the idea that I could.
What Dreams May Come brought back that discussion vividly for me because I remembered my faith in that conversation that I could believe in whatever I wanted and I would be OK. As I long as I believed in something, anything, it would be better than nothing at all. It's funny all these years later (OK, so it wasn't that long ago but it feels like ions), I haven't changed in that belief. Call me irreverent or damn as I know some people would, I refuse to believe that that makes me somehow doomed or out of the loop or missing some vital experience in my life. I remember watching A in high school and wishing I had a background like that, a deep connection with a religion, with something bigger than me. I think that's where Krystalism came from, my need to connect with something larger, something that would watch over me. Years later, that would fondly come with the smite button more often than not as my PP friends can attest for you. In the end though, I still have that idea of a larger than life presence. I don't think it has an religious affiliation to me. It is simply a friend always there when I need it to talk to or to laugh with. I know I must cause some pretty long laughs. I'm not sure what this makes me or what to call the final product of my faith but I do know I would be lost without it.
I told you this would be sentimental and at the very worse, nostalgic. I find the closer I get to the real world the more I miss those summers and those theoretical discussions which made us feel so very clever and grown up. It's one of those life's ironies that come back to bite you in the ass when you least expect it. At least I wasn't one of those raring to get to adulthood. I was perfectly happy at a kid, thank you very much. Adulthood isn't fitting quite so nicely most days. But every once in awhile, I do like to look back and laugh and see that maybe I haven't changed that much...maybe I haven't changed that much at all.
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